" But I can see myself in the mirror." We're dead not invisible, ya idiot. I swear, all those damned authors get everything wrong. I mean, that lady in the south got to interview a vampire and she still fucked it all up. Being able to fly? I tried for six months... I'd fucking drain that bitch if I ever met her." Tiffany lit another cigarette. "You really shouldn't smoke so much." What? Cancer? Never gonna happen. You'll never be sick again. Buggies take care of all that. Besides, our sense of smell is twenty times what it used to be. Believe me, you go to a party where hot, sweaty humans are packed together, you're gonna want something to cover up the smells. All of our senses are in permanent overdrive. Buggies don't want us taken by surprise I guess. You'll learn how to tone them down, tune things out." Buggies?"Tiffany swung a hand and bopped me on the side of my head. "Weren't you listening to me? I told ya all this before! A brainy vamp says we got these microbes in us. Whatever. Desperate housewives? Please shoot me! Ah..... all three Lord of the Rings movies, that will do, should lapse into a coma after about 2 hours, perfect. Mmmmmm Viggo Mortensen, my ring, your finger, anytime (Woof! Sorry bad puppy pun.) Couple of hours pass, when I hear a knock at the door. Panic Stations! I peek out the window. Shit its Adams parents! I keep quiet, they have a Key!! This could be embarrassing; after all I am padlocked into a dog collar and fingerless mitts. I wait; they knock again, and call out our names. Couple of minutes pass. I hear their car start. I look out the window again and see them drive out the gate and down the road towards Hobart. Whew, dodged a bullet. I head to the kitchen for some water. No water, no food. Great. Gotta do No 1s, head out to the yard, pee in the bushes, head back to house, the back door has blown shut, puppy is locked out. The weather has warmed up and I decide to head down to the creek to kill some time. The creek is a.
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